An unexpected gift at an unexpected time

In the movie "Finding Forester" Sean Connery's character states that the key to a woman's heart is an unexpected gift at an unexpected time. While this movie does not rank in any top 10 of the greatest movies of all time, it is a lovely film about embracing growth while staying true to who you are. I wont go further into this movie itself at this time (maybe another time) but this one phrase will be the main point of this post, although applied in a much broader than way the film does.

An unexpected gift at an unexpected time can basically be anything, it can be a free drink you offer to someone at a bar, without any ulterior motives, a flower given to a stranger or even something as simple as letting someone who stands in line behind you in the supermarket go first, because they have only one product while you have an entire cart filled with products. A Gentlemen doesnt always consider his own utility first and foremost, a true Gentlemen considers the needs of others around him aswell.

Now obviously this doesnt mean that a gentlemen exists merely as a slave to those around him, always putting their needs before his own. If only for the paradox of confusion it would create in a room filled with Gentlemen, if they all let the people around them go first, noone would be able to go anywhere. I believe that considering the needs of others doesnt have to be done all the time, there comes a point when you need to think of yourself foremost aswell. I propose merely that atleast once each day a true Gentlemen should act against his own interest and in favor of someone around him, without any immediate gain.

To bless someone with an unexpected kindness at an unexpected time.

To be a Gentle Man

As always it begins with music...

Within current popular culture the prevailing theme appears to be the american dream.The path from rags to riches. The gangster who got shot nine times in his younger days who now owns a record label and is a multi milionaire. These are the kind of people who influence the youth of today, they are the rolemodels for future generations,and as such they have a responsibility to that future generation to be the best they can be.

These modern day icons of worship should accept growth to become better men and women instead of clinging desperately to their misbegotten past. Yet current popular culture appears to be build around holding on to the past, instead of looking forward. Music is filled with tales of  misogeny whoring, violence and selling drugs, because that is the environment many of these artists were brought up in, which is understandable and a theme which exist in music across many generations. The difference with our generation however is that the modern icons are deemed cool because of the bad circumstances in their youth. The ghetto is glorified  instead of reviled as a lawless place. A place which needs to be brought up to a better standard of living, not worshipped.


The term "Gentlemen" is often linked to a kind of feudal nobility, but I believe that it can be much more. It can be a way to recognise oneself as being a good person, one who seeks to make a gentle impression upon the world around him. To be a person who guides the world away fropm the mere violent tendecies of "keeping it real" and towards a kinder gentler civilization. 

 
So from this post onward I will be making suggestions about proper conduct in the hope of providing a counterweight against the "Gangster mentality" that seems to pervade our culture. This will be the  purpose of this blog, my, perhaps delusional, hope to guide society away from the gangster mentality and back to being Gentlemen (and women) towards eachother.



Judge society by the icons it worships...